Otherways- Fiction Fanatics

Blogs often turn into personal confessions, sometimes spiraling down into places no one in their right minds wants to go. I certainly hope that's not where this is headed, but I do have a confession. I've been struggling lately with how to define "irresistably attractive" for a project I'm working on. Yes, I generally write Fantasy, and occasionally Horror, but that doesn't mean that I don't have to write a compelling romance from time to time. Fifty Shades of Grey rather left me cold, and yesterday I found myself staring at the men they had featured on the covers of a series of romance novels, completely at a loss as to why anyone would find them attractive.

One looked rather like an accountant with a bad case of nearsightedness, the second could have doubled for a serial killer, and the third? Well, I guess he wasn't bad, but I don't think I could pick him out of a police lineup. 

So I began hunting up what exactly it is that we find attractive, and couldn't help comparing these things to examples from the natural world. For instance, cologne or perfume is pretty universally accepted as an attractive addition if you're dating. Read any decent romance, and somewhere all the senses will be involved, especially scent. Which scent is most attractive is obviously something we can't decide on, just take a quick look at the perfume counter at any department store. Not to be outdone, mother nature's would be Romeos also like to add a little extra  oomph to their dating, by applying cologne as well. Of course, they can't just stop by the local mall, so many species resort to simply urinating on themselves. Apparently nothing says "I'm Irresistable" like a nice thick application of smelly pee. Porcupines, for whom dating is already a prickly arrangement, take this approach. Goats do, too. The long beard of the male goat is specifically designed to hold the urine, making him a girl magnet. 

Funny thing is, it works.

Ladies, please forgive me for pointing out the number of strange colors we paint ourselves with to be attractive to the opposite sex. Rouge, eyeshadow, lipstick, nail polish, whatever the color, makeup is a million dollar industry. I'd say this was a strange thing for humans to invent, but trust me, we're way behind the curve on this. Take a look at the face of a mandrill, its beauty proclaimed by its bright red nose and improbably blue cheeks. If that wasn't attractive enough, its hind end mimics that same neon combination, just in case their lovers missed their subtle message.  

A huge number of bird species grow an entire set of new feathers, just for the mating season.  Female chimpanzees develop rather large bright red swellings to advertise their desire, whereas its the males of the various types of Birds of Paradise that go all out on the extreme, and completely useless, feather displays. Don't get me started on antlers. Growing an entire set of giant bony spikes on your head every year simply to get a date seems like  a bit of an extreme to me.

What kind of conclusion could I possibly draw from all this? Only one, as far as I can tell: if I kept looking at these things, I'd never get my project done. The only irrefutable facts are that, man or beast, we don't want to spend our lives alone, and we're willing to go to any extremes to ensure that doesn't happen. It's also true that what attracts a wolf isn't going to "do the trick" for an African elephant, and what excites your average rhinoceros probably isn't going to have the same effect on a suburban housewife. Which means that, research aside, I'll still have to write the men that I like, the attractiveness that I enjoy, and hope that's close enough.

Cheers,

Michelle